Thursday, February 18, 2010

prelude: touch

From the benign darkness, I picked you out of a line of waiting experts. I called you by your first name- something that placed a few of your peers in distress. Outside a homeless woman was singing her child to sleep. Ang mga bata na natutulog ay mahal ng Diyos. ‘Di kumukupas. Her voice seemed to betray a pain that I could not get my head around. I wondered if she knew what she was singing about.

The moment your hands rested on my back, I knew not to regret my decision to come here. My shoulders tensed a little and then relaxed as if to say Welcome home. You’ve been missed. You were swift with your hands. They were always your greatest weapon. They cut through the tension in my body like a pair of really sharp scissors on onionskin paper.

The oil you used flowed like thick, sweet honey. Okay na po ba yung pressure? you asked. I nodded although I wasn’t really sure if you could see it from the dark room. Under your generous hands, my body felt like butter on a sizzling hot skillet. Your palms on my back, your skin on my skin. I was afraid I would melt away.

Your hands traveled south to the scar that I shield from the light of day. Okay lang po ba ito? Hindi ba masakit? Your thumb ran through its embossed outline. Matagal na ‘yan. ‘Wag ka matakot. You knew everything about my body- each hickey, each bruise, each scar. Suddenly, everything was forgotten. You forgave every insecurity. I forgave every infidelity.

I flinched when your hands were on my legs. They were tired from running away. Running from responsibilities, missed deadlines and dismissed feelings. Dahan-dahan, I begged and your arms eased up. It seemed like you spoke a language only my body could understand. You were lost in conversation. I was no longer in the room. You didn’t even notice when a warm tear fell from my eye.

I closed my eyes so I could understand your secret conversation with my skin. The Muzak played sad contemporary songs from the nineties but your words were still very clear. Shhh… It’s okay. They’re not here anymore. There is no one left to suck the youth out of your fingertips.

I let you travel to all the familiar places. My body responded with a twitch here, a moan there. I didn’t want our time to end but with the fragile ringing of the house bell, I knew it would be over soon. I closed my eyes and allowed the inevitable to come.

Sir, tapos na po. Pwera na lang kung…

The ellipsis- one of the strangest punctuation marks in the English language. Don’t you just love a happy ending?

Photo Credit: fitnesslines

Norah Jones
Sleepless Nights
Feels Like Home [DE]


  1. Sarap ng masahe!

    any suggestion?

  2. I mean any suggestion where..

  3. *blush*

    there is a typographic maxim: "treat the punctuation as a notation, not expression, most of the time." nyl finds an exception....

  4. ikaw na expert sa stylistics....

    kinabahan ako dun ha!!!! basta!

    i wonder what would Victor say about this. hmmmmm......

  5. i am a fan of ellipsis. hahaha

  6. @chyng ~ madami diyan eh. haha my last massage was at this place near our house lang. haha kung punta ka makati, turo ko sayo.

    wag ka sa wensha. someone told me a girl died daw sa pool or something.

    @LOF ~ ooh i made you blush. haha i usually don't write stuff like this but it will all make sense once you see the next post.

    @YJ ~ bakit naman? may galit ba siya sa mga masahista? lol

    at bakit ka kinabahan? haha

    @geek ~ aren't they the coolest?

  7. The last paragraph was poetry. Brilliant.

    Sigh. Your words always touch me, Nyl. Sigh.

  8. thanks. coming from you, that means a lot. :D

  9. next post!!! next post!!!


    wait, this is fiction?!

  10. niluluto na po, sir. nahihirapan lang ako hugutin yung energy para i-structure yung thoughts.

    fiction, nnnnnyeah. is anything ever purely fiction?

  11. Ah the ellipsis. As emotional as the punctuation mark, as ambiguous as the question mark, yet much much more. It captures what cannot be said, and continues without the need for language.

    The story, as vivid as if its happening before us. Every touch, every flex, every perceptible stillness. The oil, the half-smile as he glides your very landscape with a sculptors ingenue.

    Beautiful. Bitin.

  12. @andy ~ hmmm ume-ellipsis ka din. haha

    @red ~ exactly. i'm glad i'm not the only fan of the ellipsis.

    bitin ba? hala baka ma-disappoint kayo sa next post. it's not very err.. hmmm.. exciting. haha

  13. hahaha. yeah i was like... Nyl's gone gay. lol

  14. AHAHAHAHAHAHAH@happy ending!

    that's so halay a :P

  15. @LOF ~ hala! baka awayin ka ng mga ka-federathion! :D

    @ternie ~ di kaya. idol kita. i wanna be dalisay too.

  16. "Shhh… It’s okay. They’re not here anymore. There is no one left to suck the youth out of your fingertips."

    -> galing. it just cuts through - deep. fan.

  17. i could feel every touch, every knead hehehe

    ano kaya ang karugtong ng ellipsis na yan? hmmmm...

  18. @karl ~ thank you very much. welcome to my blog. i hope i can see some of your own posts as well (kung nagsu-sulat ka din) :D

    @lee ~ haha it's a little off tangent. this post was supposed to be the first two paragraphs in a post i was writing na hindi naman bastos in any way. na-carried away lang ako siguro. haha

  19. pwera na lang kung?
    i don't get it really. lol

  20. this is so... sexy! wag na kaming bitinin, nyl. ituloy na ang kuwento.
    ikaw, ha, naughty ka na. that's good. hehe! :)

  21. @LOF ~ after that whole thing in my taxonomy post, i just want to be a little more careful. lol

    @darc ~ nahiya naman ako bigla. haha

    @aris ~ ngayon lang yan! and it's for a point na i'm still trying to complete. i was just borrowing a few lines from you and some of the other bloggers. hehe

  22. I haven't experienced massage parlors kasi hiya ako (taklob kumot LOL). How does it feel kaya?

  23. haha i don't really have enough experience in the subject area to give an "expert" opinion. haha usually, sa spa lang naman ako nagpupunta. hehe

  24. the ellipsis is the damnedifyoudo damnedifyoudont punctuation mark... i love it!

  25. exakuhtukuhly! haha in fairness, mahal ka rin daw nung ellipsis. nag-text siya sakin.

  26. Very Poetic ang entry. Kinabahan ako sa dulo kala ko yung poetic entry mag turn ako to be something like Xerex.. Panalo Parin ang Pag susulat mo Idol! Sana ganyan ako kagaling para naman magkaroon ng sense ang blog ko ahahaha

    God Bless!

  27. "thanks. coming from you, that means a lot. :D"

    this sounded familiar. haha. :)

  28. haha. nakow.kiniliti mo utak ko, citybuoy. :))

  29. @jepoy ~ takot ka no? haha don't worry. tin-ry ko lang naman. hindi ko sasanayin. hehe

    at anukaba, may sense kaya blog mo. don't be silly.

    @manech ~ it seems we have done nothing but return compliments. i have to start thinking of smarter things to say. nakakahiya naman sayo. haha

    @soiebeans ~ nakiliti talaga?

  30. touch by touch, you're my all time lover
    Do it, we'll still do it anyway
    Like there is no other

  31. oh no! now that song's gonna be stuck in my head all day!

  32. galeng galeng.. clap clap. ano kayang kasunod?

  33. Sa sequel na sana ako magkocomment pero ang tagal eh. LOL. Asan na?

  34. sorry naman mawmsur.. eto na tinatapos ko na. lol

  35. I hope it happily ended.

  36. if it were real, it surely did. lol